What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
