closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
