I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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