No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Randomize
