I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
