first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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