i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
