and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Define "chronic" masturbator.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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