No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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