this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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