Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Randomize