I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I need a beard to bite.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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