he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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