I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
