Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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