So drunk, too bad you don't want this
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
the night ended with taco bell and tears
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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