Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
