What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize