New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
