fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Randomize
