Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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