just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
