i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
