Little spoons don't ask big questions
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize