There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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