She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Randomize
