Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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