Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize