i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
