They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
