I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
