I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
there is puke in my bra ... again
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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