hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize