i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I have fence marks all over my body
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
