They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
