She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize