I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize