No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
