your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
