that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
