I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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