the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
