He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
