Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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