I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
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