ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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