Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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