See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
he was CRYING into my vagina
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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