Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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