at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
